A personal Christmas gift

Player of the Year, Sam Bradford
I’m wondering! It is two days before Christmas. Being a person who tends toward self-centeredness, what is the best gift I could give myself?

Salvation? No. God gave me that. I didn’t earn it or do anything to achieve it.

Same thoughts regarding my very special wife. (We are celebrating our eighth wedding anniversary today. She deserves some kind of medallion of recognition for putting up with me that long.)

The best gift to give myself (and possibly you to yourself)? Patience, endurance.
Sam Bradford, Oklahoma quarterback who recently won the Heisman Trophy and just yesterday was voted Player of the Year by the AP, said it well. Posted on an FCA website are his words: “Probably the biggest things I learned were just the power of patience and perseverance, and knowing that everything God does, He does for a reason. He knows what He’s doing. It’s not our job to question what He’s doing with our lives. He has a purpose for it, and we just have to trust Him and know that His plan is the right way.”

Sam spoke these words prior to becoming the latest Heisman winner. He had learned these lessons from experience. He redshirted his freshman year, strugglig in his first months at college. As a redshirt, he had to sit back and watch as his friends competed on the field and shared their experiences together. All Bradford could do was watch and wait and try to trust the Lord whom he served. Little did Bradford know what was ahead. He remained faithful during the waiting period and clung to what he knew to be true - that God had a plan for his life.

Patience, perseverance, endurance.

The Book of James, chapter one, verses 2-4, challenges us with, “Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

Patience, perseverance, endurance, a gift we can give ourselves for Christmas. Waiting expectantly, even with joy, through a tough time, knowing God can use it in our lives to build a strength of character not available in comfortable times.

Merry Christmas. Will be posting again after the first of January.
P

A Christmas Gift

Trying to brush aside the materialism of the Christmas season during my meditation time this morning, I thought, “If I were giving the baby Jesus a gift, what would it be. Don’t have a lot of money, so couldn’t buy him an expensive gift. Aging and related malady has consumed the vim and vigor of youth, so can’t give Him as much energy as I’ve previously had available.

Time is my most accessible commodity now. I could present Him with my that.
But time itself is not a gift. It’s what I would do with that time.

And there is that word “do” again. A life-long pattern of “doing” – perform, achieve, conquer – typical male pursuits – but mine laced with a driving need to be recognized, to be approved, to the extent that it became idolatry. (The worship of something other than God.)

Appropriate doing is important. (“Whatever you do, do heartily as unto the Lord.”) But the best gift I can give the baby Jesus this year is a life of “being”. A life emphasizing not outward conduct but inward godly attitudes. Living from the inside out. Yes, the outside of the cup should be clean, however it is the inside of the cup that still contains too much pride, self-sufficiency, selfishness (I could go on). This needs continued cleansing and purging as I grow in my walk with The Father, slowly becoming more and more like Him.

This not only is best for me and best for Him, but it also averts the “exterior holiness” that emphasizes what to do and what not to do, leading to a prideful spirit that separates people rather than unites.

For me the process begins with prayer. “Father, create in me a clean heart that lives out the Holy Spirit controlled life best described in Galatians 5:22-24 But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there.

My prayer continues with, “Father, continue to cleanse me of resentment, discord, jealousy, selfish ambition, factions, self-centeredness (I could go on). Live through a clean vessel today, Father. Show me who needs your love and encouragement through me today.”

That is the best gift I can give the Baby Jesus. How about you?

The Strength of Brokenness

One of my ministry opportunities: chaplain of the NNU basketball team - a fantastic group of young men and coaches.

My computer was down the last couple days. The Geek squad to the rescue. However the series I started a couple days ago, will be interrupted by a week in San Antonio with Kris and family, and Fletcher and his. So we'll continue that series in January. The next couple days will be separate topics, beginning today with some great words adapted from Os Hillman.

It has been said that the world sees broken things as useless and throws them away. God sees broken things as very valuable and uses them greatly for His Kingdom work.

There is an oxymoron throughout the Bible. It says that brokenness is strength. How can this be? How can brokenness be strength? In order to use men and women to their fullest extent, the Lord has to break His servants so that they might have a new kind of strength that is not human in origin. Broken of self will, self sufficiency, pride and anything else that keeps us from living the Christ life. It is strength in spirit that is born only through brokenness.

Paul was broken on the Damascus road. Peter was broken after Jesus was taken prisoner. Jacob was broken at Peniel. David was broken after his sin with Bathsheba. The list could go on of those the Lord had to break in different ways before they could be used in the Kingdom.

When we are broken, we see the frailty of human strength and come to grips with the reality that we can do nothing in our own strength. Then, new strength emerges that God uses mightily. God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble.

Do not fear brokenness, for it may be the missing ingredient to a life that emerges with a new kind of strength and experience not known before. Pray for a broken and contrite heart that God can bless.

Two teachers; Two Learners; Two kinds of pain

Bella Rose, Barron Olaf's elder by 14 months is making the adjustment well to the intrusion of her space.

I've enjoyed being challenged by Wayne Cordeiro's book Divine Mentor. It has prompted me to do an indepth study of a wise man versus a foolish man and the ramifications. Herewith, the next few posts.

Life provides us two effective teachers: Wisdom or Consequences. Our choice of teacher determines the kind of person we are. A prudent wise person chooses the teacher “wisdom,” the foolish simpleton selects the teacher “consequences.” As these two kinds of people embrace two kinds of teachings they experience two kinds of pain. The wise prudent practices the pain of self discipline to gain wisdom. Wisdom has an initial price – discipline, obedience, consistency and time. Wisdom learns from the experiences of others, beyond their lifetime and beyond their own experiences.



The primary source for wisdom garnered from others is the Bible – viewing the successes and failures of Biblical characters along with following Biblical guidelines that lead to successful living and dying. The whole Bible was given to us by inspiration from God and is useful to teach us what is true. It shows us what is wrong in our lives. It straightens us out. It helps us do what is right. It is God’s way of making us well prepared at every point fully equipped to do good to everyone. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 LB


On the other hand, the foolish simpleton avoids the pain of discipline and embraces the pain of regret learning only from consequnces. Rather than experiencing the initial pain of self discipline, the pain is an after-effect occurrence As some would say, “learning the hard way.” The result can produce real suffering and acute pain.


The pain of self discipline to learn from the “wisdom teacher” or the pain of regret which results from learning from the teacher “consequences.” Our choise – moment by moment.

We'll pursue the topic more in tomorrow's post.

ENCOURAGEMENT

My son, Ray II, proud father of newborn Barron Olaf.


Everyone needs encouragement. In his book Encouragement Changes Everything, John Maxwell states, “And everyone – young or old, the successful or less-than successful, unknown or famous – who receives encouragement is changed by it. As Mark Twain said, ‘One compliment can keep me going for a whole month.’”

“Encouragement’s impact can be profound. A word of encouragement from a teacher to a child can change his life. A word of encouragement from a spouse can save a marriage. A word of encouragement from a leader can inspire a person to reach her potential. Like Zig Ziglar says, ‘You never know when a moment and a few sincere words can have an impact on a life.’”

To encourage people is to help them gain courage they might not otherwise possess – courage to face the day, to do what’s right, to take risks, to make a difference. And the heart of encouragment is to comunicate a person’s value. When we help people feel valuable, capable, and motivated we sometimes see their lives change forever – and then see them go on to change the world.

Isaiah 9:6For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
December is a timely placement for this Scripture. The Burwicks' have a paraphrased version that we're excited about.

For unto us a grandson is born. Unto us a grandson is given and his name shall be called Barron Olaf Burwick, mighty warrior, king of Norway, head full of golden red hair, with the Burwick chin cleft.

Ray II and Holly gave us our first Burwick grandson, Sunday Dec.14th. 7 pounds 11.6 ounces, 19 1/2 inches. Mother and baby are doing well. Father is exhausted :-)

Middle name is from his father and grandfather's middle name of Norwegian heritage.

Please join us in praying that from a very young age he will be a mighty warrior for God - loving on and encouraging others in their quest for God.

"Father, we commit this young baby man to you to accomplish the task which you are setting out for him to accomplish. Protect him from anything that would dissuade him from that pursuit. Bless his mommy and daddy (and his grandparents) as they model a walk with You for him. Draw him to yourself at a young age. May he fall in love with Jesus. Amen."

Healthy Self Examination - How To

Daughter Gretchen and her two children bungy jumping. Scarey! Just like self examination. What will I find?

Finishing the series, let's see how healthy self examination begins? Look at David's intention of Psalms 26:2 Test me, O LORD, and try me, examine my heart and my mind;
Or Psalms 51:6-7 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

David is not speaking of morbid introspection. God must be allowed to examine our innermost being. Somber self-analysis, a continual feeling of one's emotional pulse, leads to greater self-centeredness that masquerades as holy struggle to mature in Christ. Instead, it is usually a means of avoiding responsibility.
One person told me, "I must spend three hours a day in prayer, making sure there is no sin in my life." I was impressed - until I learned that her prayer time became a convenient excuse for not doing house work which she terribly detested.

God-directed self scrutiny has an inner - upward - outward focus, from self to God to others, It is an uncovering of that within that stifles our dependency on and freedom in Jesus Christ. The inner gaze reveals pride, selfishness, hurt, hate, guilt, insecurity and a host of other varmits that knaw at the underpinnings of our faith and joy in Christ - the inner focus.

God examines us through four different media: direct search, by His countenance, by the Word and through people.
1.) God's direct search:
Jeremiah 17:9-10 The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? I the LORD search the heart and examine the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve.
This describes that gentle prick of conscience that we sometimes sense. God says: "Ray, you're not loving your wife like she deserves. Cut out that selfishness. Love her like I've loved you."
God, search my heart!

2.)God's countenance:
Psalms 90:8 (Amp) Our iniquities, our secret heart and its sins which we would so like to conceal even from ourselves, you have set in the revealing light of your countenance."
Do you set aside time most every day when you're alone with God - studying the Bible, praying, being quiet? As we sit in His presence, His countenance enlightens our innermost being, revealing that which needs change or growth.

3.) God's Word:
2Timothy 3:16-17 All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
and
Hebrews 4:12 For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
Most of us spend so little time in the Word, we're not only ignorant of its teachings and principles but deaf to its probing power that excises spiritual cancer like a surgeon’s scalpel. I personally don't see how we can get along without at least 30 minutes most every day spent in concentrated Bible reading, study and prayer.
God examines us by direct search, his countenance, the Word and

4.) By people.
Hebrews 3:12-13 (Amp) Therefore beware brethren; take care lest there be in any one of you a wicked, unbelieving heart - which refuses to cleave to, trust in and rely on Him - leading you to turn away and desert or stand aloof from the living God. But instead warn (admonish, urge and encourage) one another every day, al long as it is called Today, that none of you may be hardened into settled rebellion by the deceitfulness of sin - that is, by the fraudulence, the stratagem, the trickery which the delusive glamour of his sin may play on him.
Do you have a friend or a support group that helps you with accountability, who out of care and love can gently confront you when something is blocking your growth?

It has been said that a friend is one who won't get in your way..... unless you're headed down. Are you blessed to have a friend like that? If not, endeavor to build a relationship that calls for mutual accountability.
As we allow God's scrutiny to continue in our lives and we respond, there is less self-centered dysfunction, and a greater filling of God's character within - more joy, peace, contentment, wisdom and everything else that God says is available to us.

Revelation 3:19 (Amp) Those whom I dearly and tenderly love, I tell their faults and convict and convince and reprove and chasten, that is, I discipline and instruct them. So be enthusiastic and in earnest and burning with zeal, and repent - changing your mind and attitude.

The inner focus becomes a Godward embrace to gain healing and empowerment from Him to more effectively minister to others - loving on and encouraging them.

Teen murder

Summer backyard beauty gives us hope through the non-growing season!

Approaching the end of our series on healthy self examination, I' reminded of counseling a teenage boy who was heavily involved in his church. He was wrestling with issues like speaking in tongues, why God wouldn't heal him of a minor ailment and other religious concerns.
I could never get him to face the volcano of rage toward his parents. I am not reporting a counseling success story. His picture appeared in the local newspaper some time ago - murder. He refused to look inward. A young waitress was the recipient of his displaced rage.

SCRIPTURE’S ADVICE
To make sure I'm not just suggesting some self examination pop-psychobabble, let's look at Scripture to see what it says about penetrating the darkness within.
Leviticus 16:29-30 (LB) This is a permanent law: you must do no work on the twenty-fifth day of September, but must spend the day in self examination and humility.....for this is the day commemorating the atonement, cleansing you in the Lord's eyes from all of your sins.
This comes from the Old Testament. Let's check what the New Testament would indicate.
1 Corinthians 11:25-34 gives us the Holy Communion context. Paul here exhorts us to examine ourselves before taking communion. He says some people had not and their sin had caused sickness and even death.

Covered sin is nothing to indulge. Paul further teaches:
2 Corinthians 13:5 Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you--unless, of course, you fail the test?
Are you and I really Christians? Does our life reflect Christ even at home?

I like Verner's test of a Christian in his book "Fire in Coventry."
In my church we don't give pamphlets to people nor have missions. We just send one or two Christian families to live in a village. When people see what Christians are like, they want to be Christians themselves.
I don't think Verner is criticizing church missions programs. He is suggesting that our brand of Christianity must be contagious. If it isn't - check up on yourself. Are you really a Christian? Would there be enough evidence to convict you and me of being Christian in court?

7- The Tell-Tale Heart

Pray for John, my prayer partner's son, soon to be deployed to a Hot Zone.

When I think of living in darkness, not wanting to face inner pain or inadequacy (or sin), I'm reminded of Edgar Allen Poe's macabre short story, "The Tell-Tale Heart."

A homicide victim is buried beneath the floor of the murderer's house. The man is so confident about the clandestine killing that when interrogated by the police, he seats himself in a chair directly over the burial location.

“In the enthusiasm of my confidence, I brought chairs into the room, and desired them here to rest from their fatigues, while I myself, in the wild audacity of my perfect triumph, placed my own seat upon the very spot beneath which reposed the corpse of the victim.
The officers were satisfied. My manner had convinced them. I was singularly at ease.

But his coolness evaporates as the conversation continues. Soon he senses a strange pounding noise in his head. The pounding seems to be coming from beneath the floor where the corpse is located. He is sure that it is the beating of the dead man's heart. He wonders why no one else notices what he is hearing.

No doubt I grew very pale; but I talked more fluently, and with a heightened voice. Yet the sound increased - and what could I do?...I talked more quickly - more vehemently; But the noise steadily increased. I arose and argued about trifles, in a high key and with violent gesticulations, but the noise steadily increased. Why would they not be gone? Oh God! what could I do? I foamed - I raved - I swore! I swung the chair upon which I had been sitting, and grated it upon the boards, but the noise arose over all and continually increased. Was it possible they heard not?

Finally with a shriek the darkness dweller confessed: "Villains!" I shrieked, "dissemble no more! I admit the deed! - tear up the planks! - here, here! it is the beating of his hideous heart!"

A severe example of a darkness dweller - a clear picture of guilt - covered sin.

King David describes the same scenario with a transparent exposure in Psalms 32:3-5 LB:
There was a time when I wouldn't admit what a sinner I was. But my dishonesty made me miserable and filled my days with frustration. All day and all night your hand was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water on a sunny day until I finally admitted all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide them. I said to myself, I will confess them to the Lord and you forgave me.
All my guilt is gone.

Sin causes misery, but notice David is saying his dishonesty about his sin made him miserable. There's a cure for sin - repentance. No cure for covered sin. Result - misery.
David's son, King Solomon added this twist to the message:
Proverbs 28:13 A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes them, he gets another chance. (LB)
Sin covered, not acknowledged, unconfessed, unrepented, not only leads to darkness and lack of joy, peace, contentment, etc, but also contributes to or causes a host of diseases.

Oh, the value of healthy self examination. "Search me O God..."

Who Me? 6 CAMOUFLAGED GARBAGE

Special friend, Steve Mountjoy

One of the mosts interesting (and successful) counseling cases I experienced during private practice days was a very sweet, loving middle-aged Christian lady who had an uncontrollable compulsion to think extremely vulgar thoughts toward God. This is an example of the "darkness dwelling" which we've been addresssing the last five posts.

She was one who was in church every time the door was open. She taught in a Christian school. She volunteered as a secretary part time for the pastor. The list could go on and on about her spiritual activity. She in fact desired to be a Godly woman. I was most impressed with her humility and her teachability. What a sharp woman. We'll call her Martha.

Why would she have such vulgar thoughts toward God? Her psychologist just told her to quit going to church and reading her Bible, that was just exacerbating the problem. She didn’t want that prescription.
Her counseling began. We endeavored to pierce through the darkness hiding her obscure inner garbage. (If she had been aware of any rubbish in her life, she would have definitely dealt with it. She was that desirous of righteous living.)

Her story involved the pastor of her church. He was the type of church leader who thought he had the last word on everything. He was boss. She was a compliant person. He would ask her to bring work clothes with her to the office periodically. After she had performed secretarial chores for an hour or so, he would ask her to change into grubbies so they could perform some janitorial tasks. He would leave her office and go to his. She would change clothes and they'd be off to do some type of cleaning.

This went on for some time until one day "Martha" was looking for something in the pastor's office. As she was searching the storage closet, she ran across a hole in the wall. About half-inch in size. She peered through the hole and found that it gave her a panoramic view of the office in which she worked. She couldn't believe it. Her pastor watching her undress through the hole in the wall. Being the compliant person she was, plus being indoctrinated to believe the pastor was always right, she deeply stuffed the anger.

Her husband, being the same kind of compliant personality, encouraged her repressing technique of handling emotions and just suggested she not disrobe in the office anymore. They chose not to say a word to the pastor. To suggest to her that she resented her pastor was hard for her to swallow. "A good Christian just doesn't get angry," was her premise.

The pastor situation was just the surface issue. We peeled off onion layers of rejections, hurts and bitterness over the next five counseling sessions. I was amazed to see the devastating trauma through which she had lived. Her childhood was horrendous. Her dad left the family for another woman when Martha was eight years old. Her mother became a prostitute, bringing the men home with her. Not only would she view the panorama of sexual acts but was also exposed to participation herself. She came through this childhood ordeal without losing her sanity because of a neighbor lady who took her to church. This was her oasis - the only place where she felt loved and accepted.

Martha's pain and resentment had been unknowingly displaced on God causing the vulgar thoughts toward Him. AS counseling progressed, facing and processing the pain within, she became free. Periodically, she would have a dysfunctional thought and realize that she was either not facing a current anger, or a deeper hurt was surfacing that needed a deeper level of processing.

Martha is an example of the darkness dweller that wears religious masks to avoid facing the garbage within. She was not even aware of what she was doing, but the destructiveness was devastating.

Rationalizing, attacking, rearranging, wearing religious masks - all examples of darkness dwelling. If these destructive, self-protective devices are not faced and stripped away, positive self esteem, joy, peace, contentment, physical health and much more is forfeited. Fellowship with the Father is the greatest loss.

Edgar Allen Poe is up next!

Who Me? 5 THE "BUTCHER KNIFE PROPHET"

Granddaughter Gabriella Scoleri

One of my former clients gave me permission to use his story regarding healthy self examination. He entitles it "a white robe over nasty underwear."

The Lord had seemingly given "Pete" (not his real name) the gift of prophecy. He would sense that God would be telling him to go to Fort Walton Beach, Florida (a trip of about 5 hours from Birmingham). He was to go to a certain pier where he would meet a man with a red baseball cap. Pete was to minister to him.

Sure enough, after the long drive, Pete would pull up to the pier and there stood a man in a red baseball cap. A conversation was initiated and it was obvious that God had sent Pete to encourage, comfort and instruct the man.
This kind of experience happened frequently.

However, as Pete so graphically described, "I had concentrated on my spiritual gift and had a blind eye to my character." He was in my office because he had just taken a large hunting knife and out of a fit of rage, destroyed $3000 worth of furniture and threatened to kill his wife.

Rather than allowing his gaze at God to penetrate through his fig leaves, and reveal garbage within, Pete kept busy with religious activity ... a white robe over nasty underwear. Hurts, hates, guilt, selfishness, insecurity and other "nasties" lay submerged for years and finally exploded through the destructive blade of the butcher knife. A religious mask to keep from healthy self examination.

Rationalize, attack, rearrange and religious masks all utilized to prevent facing oneself. Do any of these apply to you? It’s often more comfortable living in darkness but, is the payoff worth it?
A challenge we all have: we can sweep the streets and make them look clean. But until we climb down into the sewer and clean out the filth beneath the streets, we're obscuring God's production of his qualities and fruit in our lives.

Tomorow's post describes a strong church lady with vulgar thoughts toward God.

Who Me? - 4

Healthy self examination begins with gazing at God sufficiently to see what is within ourselves that is not of God and needs change - that needs growth. Most of us don't want to look inward and there are some who are constantly naval gazing. When we begin to look inward there still is a tendency to want to escape what we’re observing about ourselves. One or more of four avenues are taken.

1. RATIONALIZING
My wife says to me "Ray, you're being too harsh."
If I want to stay in darkness, not facing the light of what she just said, I'll rationalize: "Hey, Theresa, I'm not as harsh as I once was." (As if that gives me three points and victory.) But I'm not facing and resolving the destructiveness of harshness at that moment. I'm choosing to stay in darkness by rationalizing. The result? No change. No growth. Probably a little more guilt.
Can you give an example of this in your life?

2. ATTACKING/BLAMESHIFTING
Attacking is another favorite trick to keep out of the light. "Ray, you're being too harsh," my wife says. "Well, Theresa, how about you? You're always ..." and I get off on some tangent about her. Blameshifting. I don't have to face me if I can place the bee on her. Can you give an example of this in your life?
Rationalizing, attacking/blameshifting and some folk rearrange rather than come out of the darkness and face the light and grow.

3. REARRANGE
"My husband is treating me unfairly; I'll just get a job and not have to be around him that much."
"My wife is a nag; or, my husband is so controlling, I'll work longer hours to avoid her (his)unpleasantness."
"I'm single. Lonely. I'll stay busy."
Rearranging, coping, rather than facing the light, looking within and making attitudinal changes necessary. It is easier to change circumstances than alter attitudes. Does this apply to you? And lastly:

4. WEARING RELIGIOUS MASKS
Rationalizing, attacking, rearranging and now, wearing religious masks is examined as the fourth type of darkness dweller. (Men like darkness rather than light because their deeds are evil)
Rather than facing troubling issues within, it is easier to be religious. Be in church every time the door is open. Tithe. Bible studies, witnessing classes, choir, meetings galore ... nothing wrong with these individually, but in masse, it spells avoidance. Like the Pharisees, very religious, but oblivious to the garbage within.
Which of these four best characterizes you?
Next post will describe a person who wears religious masks as an escape.

Who Me?–3 Yes, You Ray

Enjoyed visit with Gretchen in Orlando

Healthy self examination has been the theme of these last posts. An interesting phenomenen happened yesterday in my time of solitude with God. It was as if God said, “Let Me help you experience about that which you are writing.”

I had written in my journal about feeling inadequate in my speaking lately and it wasn’t about stuttering. I felt that I was too quick to give answers in the small groups in which I participate and I didn’t feel like I was doing a good job giving the devotionals to the NNU basketball team. A gray clould seemed to be hovering over my head.

The Lord so gently told me (and who else would have said the following to me?), “Ray, you’re back into spiritual pride. You’ve memorized a few books of the Bible. You’ve been having a consistent Bible/prayer time with Me for 62 years. You’re back to thinking you’ve got all the answers for people in your small groups and you’re teaching at the basketball team, not sharing with them.”

I’m grateful that God is so gentle in his confrontations. No condemnation. Just a, “Here’s something Ray that is hurting you. Repent.” And that I did immediately. It was amazing to sense the gray cloud disappear instantly. God is so good.

I’m not an arrogant, cocky, prideful person. But I think spiritual pride is uglier. In a sense it is playing God in other people’s lives. So, back to the Scriptural theme of this series – Isaiah 6:1-8.: behholding God’s majesty and holiness. Seeing our “woe is me.” Repentance. Cleansing. Ready for service. Next post will focus on what we tend to do rather than repent.

Who me? - 2

Grandson Dominick sits by a stack of Idaho potatoes in Orlando restaurant.

Continuing a series on "Healthy Self-examination": we have a tendency to resist seeing that about ourselves which is impeding God's working deep growth within ourselves. Our natural tendency is to cover the ungodliness within by living in darkness. John describes it in
John 3:19-21 This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil."

Crime is more rampant in the evening hours. Darkness cloaks its activities. Men love darkness .... How would your personalize these thoughts? Are you one with very little self examination; too much or morbid introspection; or an adequate self perception. One way to answer this is to ask someone close to you how they perceive you.

THE BEGINNINGS OF DARKNESS DWELLING
Adam and Eve started this darkness\denial process, covering themselves with fig leaves and hiding behind a tree. They set a pattern that we all tend to follow. We'd rather camouflage the sin within, live in darkness and not face ourselves or God.

Denial is more comfortable. Looking inward can be painful. Even depressing. Why bother to examine oneself if it just leads to greater awareness of selfishness, pride, resentment or unbelievable sorrow.

Yet, if that awareness shows us dysfunctional thinking or behavior, and gives us a greater thirst for God's answers, then the temporary pain of looking inward brings ultimate payoff. A quiet growth in grace and character. A cleaning out of the garbage within. A greater freedom, peace, joy, contentment, wholeness. A more healthy self perception. Praise the Lord. That is what is available to us as Christians.

But it begins with gazing at God sufficiently (Isaiah 6:1-4) to see what is within ourselves that is not of God and needs change. Consistent time in God's Word and asking God to illuminate our minds is of utmost importance. When we begin to look inward there still is a tendency to want to escape what we’re observing about ourselves. One or more of four avenues are taken. We'll begin our next post at this point.

Who, Me? Healthy self examination

World's Greatest Wife in Cozumel
Being with a dear friend recently is prompting these next few posts. He is a very bright young man who desires to be a strong Christian. Studies Scripture consistently. Does a wonderful job of teaching But doesn't want to hear anything negative about himself - from his wife or anyone else. He doesn't want to face his inner baggage ( that we all have). Consequently his selfishness and rudeness based in some deep childhood challenges is hurting his family deeply.

He's not one to pray Psalm 139: 23-24 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Search me O God – not excessive naval gazing introspection but allowing God to search us. Being open and available for His inspection. The results coming from the HOly SPirit directly or from someone that God chooses to use as His messengere.

Isaiah chapter 6 has always been a great challenge for me. The first four verses depict the grand awesomeness of God. 6:1 In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple.2 Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying.3 And they were calling to one another: "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory."4 At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.

“I saw the Lord,” said Isaiah. He pictures the awesome majesty of God. Then, verse 5.
"Woe to me!" I cried. "I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live
among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty."

In some fashion Isaiah saw God. He observed the holiness of God. His gaze at God's holiness, revealed Isaiah's "unholiness" in contrast. "I am unclean," was his response.

Job had the same experience.
Job 42:5-6 " My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes." Basically, both Job and Isaiah are saying "when you indeed see God, you are made aware of the lack of God in your life - your ungodliness." His purity reveals our impurity.
"Oophda," as the Norwegians would say, "I don't know if I want to view God if the result is seeing my inadequacy, my inner garbage." So often that is the life theme we live out. We don't want to look inward.
I’m reminded of John Calvin's challenge: you don't know God if you don't know self and you can’t know yourself without knowing God. And part of knowing self is to see the garbage within that needs purging – the stuff that tears down healthy self perception. That obstructs living the abundant life Jesus promises in John 10:10.

All of us tend not to look inward. We excuse it by saying “I don’t believe in naval gazing.” However, Jeremiah 17:9 tells us: The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? My friend Jack, is not open to see the deceitfulness of his heart, hurting himself, his family and his profession.
More tomorrow.

Died – Brought Back

Meet Marco from Canada. It has been a long time since I have seen a person so hungry to increase his walk with God. What a great time we had together discussing God's Word. He studying to be a medical missionary.

Have you ever seen a person die and be brought back to life? Two weeks ago, we were visiting church in Orlando with my daughter and her family – First Baptist. Probably 3000 people in attendance. Shortly after the opening music finished, I notice a commotion in the middle of the sanctuary. I saw a man pounding on the chest of someone lying in a pew. Two doctors were on the man instantly and reported no breathing and no heart beat. Dead!

As the pastor saw what was happening he called the audience to prayer. Have you ever been in a crowd where a large throng was centered in prayer toward one issue? Wow! You could just feel the presence of God moving in the room.

Soon the group dispersed so I figured an ambulance had taken him away. A situation like that has a way of heightening one’s sensitivity to mortality.

At the close of the service the pastor was handed a note. Reading it he said, “Here’s a note from the chaplain of the hospital stating that the gentleman was sitting up and talking." Everyone clapped and cheered.

The following Sunday, the pastor was going through his pre-preaching comments and in so doing walked back to the middle of the sanctuary. He put his arm around a man and said, “this is the man who we prayed for last week. He had had a 100% blockage in one artery, 90% in another and 70% in the third. They inserted stints and he’s not only here today but came early to teach his sunday school class.” The crowd erupted with praise to God for His touch on the man.

The pastor went on to say that a doctor told the man that if he had been in any other place – home, golf course, wherever, he wouldn’t have been saved. And of course everyone laughed at the double meaning of “saved” in the church. What an inspiring experience.

My daughter Gretchen and husband Kevin.