Rafting trauma

Life is precious and precarious. One of my best friends, John Vawter, wrote me the following note and gave me permission to share it with you.

I almost lost Susan Sunday in the Grand Canyon. Below is what I wrote yesterday in my journal.

I woke up about 2:30 this morning and Susan was lying beside me in bed. Later, when it was time to get up I laid in bed and listened to her breathe while she still slept. I laid there for quite awhile listening to her breathe. I thanked God that she was there...beside me…breathing and alive. Let me explain.


Yesterday I went to Page, AZ to meet Susan and our son Michael who were returning to Page from a week floating on the Colorado River through the Grand Canyon. I knew something was up by the way they greeted me when I pulled up to the curb at the Page airport. They were standing with other rafters who were waiting for their respective rides. Michael hugged me and then said, “Hug Mom gently.” He then said, “I will drive and you sit in the back with Mom.” Her left wrist is swollen and bruised. Together they said they needed something to drink and they would explain the injury when we got to the restaurant…any restaurant.

On Sunday, which was the last day on the river before they were lifted out by helicopter on Monday to catch a small plane back to Page, they stopped before lunch to hike up the famous Havasu Creek which is the second largest tributary that flows into the Colorado. They explained that the beauty of the side canyon caused by the creek is unexcelled.

As they were coming back down Michael was helping an older woman who was having trouble with her footing. He was about 30 yards ahead of Susan. Michael had just gotten the woman to the point where she felt comfortable to walk on her own when he heard everyone screaming. Susan had slipped and fallen head over heels down a 10 foot stair stepped rock wall and tumbled into the river…which had a very strong current. She was not wearing a life jacket. They had been instructed to grab the top of their life jackets near the throat and position their feet down river if they ever fell in. She did that…and realized she did not have a jacket on. The current took her down twice and she had trouble kicking because the shirt which had been tied around her waist was now pulled down around her feet. She was pushed under one of the boats and when she popped out she was being pulled down the river. (Remember, I am hearing this for the first time in the restaurant in Page. I wanted to ask questions but they continued.)

Another boating group had tied up along side the two boats of Susan’s and Michael’s group. That group was also hiking up the Havasu Creek canyon. One of their boatmen had broken his flip flop and was back in his boat getting a replacement when he saw Susan struggling and floating by. He immediately put on his life jacket, grabbed a flotation device and jumped in…and got to her almost immediately. He said (as they are trained to do), “Hi, I’m Craig. What’s your name?” One of the boatmen from Michael’s and Susan’s group got on his life jacket jumped in almost at the same time. He was upriver and it took a short while before he got out to them as the three of them were swept out of sight around the cliff wall.

Michael said he was tempted to jump in—without a life jacket—to get Susan. He was prevented from doing this because some boats were between her and him. This forced him to think clearly and get a life jacket on before he did anything. Otherwise, two people would have been in the river without life jackets—and those two people would have been my wife and my son.

The other boatmen, an EMT from Las Vegas who was a fellow rafter and Michael got into one of the boats. They were frantic to get down river. It was a struggle to get the boat out because it was jammed between the other boats by the force of the current. The crew cut the ropes to get their boat loose as it was faster than untying. People on the shore pushed and Michael pushed against one of the other boats to get their boat out.

Meanwhile Susan and the two men had floated on down the river out of sight beyond a rock cliff. Together they floated about 130-150 yards down the river and got over to a small eddy where the currents were not so strong. But there was an overhanging rock wall that was very jagged so they had nothing onto which they could hold.

Those in the boat did get to Susan and the two boatmen and pulled them in. The disaster was averted. When they got Susan back to where the spot where the other boats were docked the EMT checked her over. She has abrasions on her leg, hip, back and the banged up left wrist and hand which will be x-rayed today. She also has a sore neck which the doctor will check out when she is with him today. Michael said the whole ordeal took less than ten minutes (maybe five) but it seemed like an hour.

Michael encouraged me not to consider the “what if?” questions. That was/is hard to do. As we sat in the restaurant I asked Susan if she thought she was going to drown. She answered in her characteristically understated way, “That thought crossed my mind.” Michael joined in and said, “I thought it as I saw Mom being pulled by the currents past the boats” and then he began to cry. He also said that after the EMT checked out Susan their entire group got in their two boats and continued their journey down river because the government maintains a fairly tight schedule on the boats on the river, their locations, etc. It was then…about an hour after the ordeal…that the impact of what could have happened hit him and it was then that he broke down and cried over the thought of losing his mother.

So, I laid in bed this morning listening to Susan breathe as she slept. The “what if?” questions crept into my mind? “What if she had drowned? What if her body had not been found? What would it have felt like to wake up without her beside me?” There are more “what if?” questions but I am trying to follow son Michael’s advice and not go there. I am just grateful for the broken flip-flop that put the boatman in exactly the right spot to jump in to rescue Susan. As you can imagine I thank God for that man…and I thank Him that my dear Susan is alive…and breathing beside me this morning when I awakened.

Susan's rafting journal will appear in the next blog

We're enjoying our stay at Theresa's son's new house in Arvada, Co. Fletcher is pictured on the right with his life-long friend, Jeff Leonnig.

Some tidbits from Dallas Willard's Renovation of the Heart:
The single most importnt thing on out mind is our idea of God and the associated images.
My image of God was a heavenly being that carried a big stick, ready to clobber me if I stepped out of line.

The image over the years has evolved into a more accurate picture of Matthew 7:11: "You earthly fathers being evil, love to give good gifts to your children, how much more does your heavenly Father want to give to you."

Willard notes, The process of spiritual formation in Christ is one of progressively replacing destrctive images and ideas of God with the images that filled the mind of Christ Himself. "I and the Father are one."

I encourage you to obtain this book and enljoy with me a RENOVATION OF THE HEART.

ADVERSITY

I love to ask people for their personal stories. Usually they are informative and inspiring and I learn much from them. The following is Dr. Lewis Gregory's story entitled "Adversity." He is president of Source Ministries

My wife Lue and I flew to Bermuda on August 9, 1996 for me to speak at the Willowbank Christian Resort. While in Bermuda, we experienced our worst tragedy and our most glorious triumph. It began on Monday, August 12th, as we were riding our mopeds back to Willowbank.

Only God knows why I looked behind me, but as I turned I got the greatest shock of my life. Lying face down in the middle of the road was my darling wife. I was momentarily tempted with anger at whoever had caused this horrible thing. But the Lord graciously intervened by turning my thoughts to Him in prayer and praise. As I acknowledged Him in this situation, He began to direct my path.

Fear Surged Through Me

Immediately I rushed to Lue’s side. Fear surged through me because there was no sign of life. She was motionless, breathless and lifeless. I was faced with the shocking sensation that I had lost my wife. Yet God’s marvelous peace prevailed. I instantly placed my hand on her and began to pray. I have no idea what I prayed, but God was clearly ministering life to her. Thankfully, after several minutes she began gasping for breath! Praise God for His healing presence!

Amidst the joy that she was breathing, I was hit with another wave of grief at the extent of her injuries. As she turned her head to the side, her nose appeared smashed flat and blood was running from the back of her head. However, the Lord’s mighty presence continued to sustain me. Amazingly, I was caught up in worshiping Him and began to sing songs of praise.

Why?

Of course Satan was also there with that age-old question, “Why?” along with, “How could God do this to me? After all, He’s supposed to be protecting us.” These temptations stem from the tree of knowledge and are aimed at undermining our faith by discrediting God’s character. We must not give place to the devil by dwelling on such thoughts or they will surely produce death in us. Our only hope is to walk by faith rather than sight. By God’s grace I did; I rejected those thoughts and agreed with Him as He began flooding my mind with Scripture.

When the ambulance arrived 25 minutes later my prayers turned to the medical personnel. As they examined Lue she was still very disoriented, but at least she remained conscious. By now she was breathing fine and her nose looked normal. They concluded there was no apparent paralysis. However, because of the severity of the accident, they were very concerned about the possibility of a broken neck or back. They put her in a neck brace and then gently carried her to the ambulance.

The ride seemed to take forever due to the narrow crowded roads. Furthermore, the roughness of the road appeared to agitate her condition. Her pain increased and she began vomiting. By now it was clear that Lue had incurred a severe head injury. They called the hospital and requested that a doctor meet us. I asked God to provide the very best doctors possible. When we arrived, the chief emergency room physician, who is considered one of their best doctors, was standing by. Praise God, He had answered another prayer!

During Lue’s stay in the emergency room, I was allowed to remain by her side to comfort her. She went through numerous tests to determine the extent of her injuries. The doctor carefully explained that she had extensive brain damage that included hemorrhaging in the frontal lobe, excess fluid, swelling and a fractured skull. Her condition was critical! Therefore, she was taken to intensive care.

My Prayers Intensified

I began praying Psalm 23:5, asking the Lord to anoint Lie’s head with the healing oil of the Holy Spirit and quicken her mortal body. I also prayed for God to provide intercessors who would believe Him for a miracle. I then asked God to send someone to stand in faith with us. That night He sent Morag Whitehall from Willowbank to minister to us. Her compassion, prayers of faith and servant heart was exactly what we needed.

I made only 3 calls while they were transferring Lue, but the news spread quickly. One call was to my friend Dutch Slade, who is a medical doctor and one of our intercessors. After contacting the hospital, he notified me that Lue was getting adequate care and would not need to be transferred to the States. He also said that he and his wife were praying for a miraculous recovery. Later I learned that hundreds of people had been praying for us. Several people even called the hospital to pray with me. It was such a relief to know that others were bearing this burden with us. I felt personally encouraged and reassured that a miracle was taking place.

From that moment on the road when the Lord compelled me to pray I had a definite sense that God was performing a miracle. I even shared with the medical personnel that I was expecting God to do a miracle. I’m not sure what they thought, but it did wonders for me. Each time I told someone, it helped to increase my own faith. For example, while Lue was in the ER, I told our ambulance driver that I was trusting God to heal her. He commented that he thought I must have been praying en route to the hospital because of the way I had remained so calm and peaceful. Praise God, in the midst of our darkest hour His light was still shining through! Oh how this boosted my faith…

Faith Becomes Sight

On the second day our faith began to become sight. The doctors decided to do another CT scan to determine if they needed to tap her skull and relieve the pressure on her brain. Much to our delight, her brain appeared normal! The swelling was gone, there was no more excess fluid and the damage to the frontal lobe was gone. When I informed Dr. Slade, he confirmed that God had performed a miracle because that type of head injury just does not go away in less than 24 hours. Glory to God! What a marvelous answer to prayer.

Because Lue no longer had any brain damage, they moved her the next day to a regular room to recuperate. After 9 days she was released from the hospital. Since we’ve been home, she has gradually built up her strength and energy. After three weeks she was walking a mile, and even drove the car to one of my preaching engagements an hour away. Now, two months later, she appears to be back to normal and most of her scars have already gone away. This has been totally a work of God’s grace and it is glorious to behold!

What actually happened to Lue? She was the victim of a hit and run accident. A speeding motorcycle struck her from behind. The police later caught the driver, Jamal, an eighteen year old Bermudian who was driving a stolen motorcycle without any insurance. His license had previously been suspended. Please join us in praying for his salvation.

We don’t begin to understand what happened, but one thing we do know, this too was God! Yes, we are more convinced than ever that He is in sovereign control of our lives. He is for us, and therefore, nothing that comes into our lives can be against us. No, it didn’t look good, and it certainly didn’t feel good. But regardless of how it appeared from the human perspective, God meant it for our good and His glory (Genesis 50:20). We were able to know Christ in ways that would not have been possible apart from experiencing this facet of the fellowship of His sufferings. And, by God’s grace, because we were living from the center, where Christ is our life rather than the circumference where circumstances rule our life, none of these things moved us. Furthermore, we were able to glory even in this our greatest tragedy.

God’s Abiding Presence

As grateful as I am to God for Lue’s healing, I am even more grateful for the miracle of His abiding presence, which enabled us to walk triumphantly through it all. God initially told me that although we were going through the fire, we would not be burned and we would come out without the smell of smoke (Isaiah 43:2, Daniel 3:27). From the moment of the accident, God was obviously under girding us. During the whole time, the Lord’s soothing presence kept us enveloped in a cocoon of calm assurance. He sustained us throughout the entire ordeal. We discovered in our greatest tragedy what it means experientially for us to be more than conquerors through Christ.

What I have described is not about being able to put on the right mask. It’s not even about having the right theological answers. And it is certainly not about being a super saint with extra ordinary faith. This is about knowing Christ as your life!

It’s also about having your life firmly established on Christ the solid rock! When you do, there will be a spontaneous flow of the Holy Spirit’s power through your life. The result is that you will experience the abiding presence of Christ in your life to meet every need of your life. This is what it means to walk in the Spirit. This is living by faith. And this is only possible by the grace of God.

P.S. Two years later Lue went to a neurologist for an evaluation of the condition of her brain. After an extensive battery of tests including an MRI, CAT scan etc. it was determined that she was completely normal. In fact, there was no indication of any brain damage whatsoever, not even a scar! Glory to God!


Therefore, oh Lord, we do praise You for Your all sufficient grace!!!

e

Copyright©1996 Dr. Lewis Gregory
SOURCE MINISTRIES
PO Box 391852
Snellville, GA 30039

Thanks Dr. Gregory for allowing me to use this on my blog. It is very inspiring and convicting.
I've got a ways to go to grow IN THAT KIND OF FAITH.

By the way, we're enjoying our "new minsistry" of grndprenting in Denver.We are in Colorado with the four Keister granddaughters

Arkeo

Arkeo – a simple litle Greek word that came alive Sunday, as visiting speaker at our church, Jerry Porter, shared his story of losing their 21-year old daughter to cancer.

Arkeo – meaning “sufficient.” Arkeo is taught most frequently from 2 Corinthians 12:9 where Paul is shown praying three times for removal of the thorn in his flesh. Each time He (Christ ) said, “My grace is (sufficient) all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.

AS Dr. Porter told his story of losing his daughter, he shared how the emotional pain was severe for both he and his wife. However, as the pain was processed with God (sometimes vehemetely) the assuarnce came that His grace was sufficient even for their painful situation.

How reassuring it was to be reminded that God had arkeo for me but also for my wife as she assumes a more detailed role of “taking are of me” as I or if I become immobile with Parkinson’s Disease.

I still abhor the idea of becoming a burden to my precious wife, but when those thoughts come I must bring to recall "ARkeo – sufficiency, God’s that is, for all we have to face. "

Do you have any need for arkeo today?

A H-H-Hesitant Writer

I’ve put off blogging long enough. Procrastination, laziness, busy with other things and flat out pride. I don’t like to admit that life the last few weeks has been rough – a roller coaster. I don’t like to be a whiner. I don’t want your sympathy so I’ve been silent. It is much more fun to report success stories or to give tidbits on helping people come through a tough time. I’m having to internalize my own teaching at this time and this ol’ Norwegian/Estonian is sometimes a slow learner. “I come too late, too smart.”

Roller coaster. The excitement of locating and buying an RV fifth wheel and a Ford 250 to pull it so that we can begin our “new ministry” – staying for an extended period of time at each of our children’s homes, GRANDPARENTING. Loving on and encouraging them. Being of any help possible with our children. Also, the hip replacement went smoother than expected. Quick recovery. The roller coaster is up there.

Then there is the pit. Stuttering is at times worse then it has ever been. The body and mind continue to deteriorate, a gift of Parkinson’s. I think I’ve handled that fairly well – either through denial or placing my faith in God who loves me and wants the best for me.

But this week a new hurdle was faced. Care-giving for a person in stage four or five of Parkinson’s is quite a challenge. I’m in stage three, knocking on the door of stage four. There is a good chance that I’ll be a real burden to Theresa. I’ve felt horrible this weekend thinking of all the ramifications that could take place… dementia, bed-ridden, etc. I believe God gives me grace to handle it for myself. But to think of my dear wife, a precious gift from God, having the burden to live with – I was really down and blown away about that.

So I put my counselor hat on. Got down on the floor “eating rug” and told my woes to God. Had my list of stages four and five before me. He gently instructed me to draw a cross through the page along with an empty tomb, reminding me of Galatians 2:20:
My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

It was if Jesus said, “Trust me. I won’t only work out the best for you but also for Theresa. I love you. I love your wife.”
So here I am, naked as it were, singing that ol’ spiritual, “it’s me O Lord, standing in the need of prayer.”

By faith I bring to mind and set it on Psalm.34:1-10
I will praise the Lord no matter what happens. I will constantly speak of his glories and grace. I will boast of all his kindness to me. Let all who are discouraged take heart. Let up praise the Lord together and exalt his name. For I cried to him and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears. Others too were radiant at what he did for them. Theirs was no downcast look of rejection. This poor man cried to the Lord and the Lord heard him and saved him out of his troubles. For the Angel of the Lord guards and rescues all who reverence him Oh Put God to the test and see how kind he is. See for yourself the way his mercies shower down on all who trust in Him. If you belong to the Lord, reverence him; for everyone who does this has everything he needs. Even strong young lions sometimes go hungry, but those of us who reverence the Lord will never lack any good thing.

Mental lImagry

It is back to speech therapy again. The ol’ stuttering has taken off to pergatory. So, Becky my therapist and I are currently working on mental imagry. Thought you might find some tidbits for yourself that could be helpful. So I share with you ….

Interviews with 1500 very successful executives reveals that they imagined themselves performing at a higher than normal level. It is believed that before a person can change, he must see himself in a new role. Arnold Lazarus in his book “In the Mind’s Eye,” says, ‘IF you wish to accomplish something in reality, first picture youself achieving it in imagination. There is an essential scientific fact that says, ‘ the human nervous system cannot tell the difference between an actual experience and an experience imagined vividly and in detail.

I believe the mental imagry concept can be backed up with Scripture, “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” Is that Proverbs 23:7?

So, just having a mindset of not stuttering is not going to work. I’ve tried it. This is virgin territory for me. But I think before each speaking opportunity, I must see myself as God sees me. (Not contaminated by fear or stuttering habit.) And I’m trying to conceptualize this succintly now on a 3 by 5 card to carry with me. I’d appreciate your prayers regarding this as I write in the next few days.

Spiritual Formation - Face Reality

Dallas Willard has a great book called Renovation of the Heart in which he speaks of denial as a hindrance to spiritual formation. "WE must see the soul and the person in its ruined condition, with its malformed and dysfunctional mind, feelings, body and social relations, before we can understand that it must be delivered and reformed and how that can be done.

"One of the greatest obstacles to effective spiritual formation in Christ today is simple failure to understand and acknowledge the reality of the human situation as it affects Christians and nonChristians alike. We must start from where we really are.

"Choice is where sin dwells. So frequntly sin is covered up. Though sexual sin is widely publicized it is far from being the only problem. The presence of vanity, egotism, hostility, fear, indifference and down right meanness can be counted on among professing Christians. Their opposites cannot be counted on or simply assumed in the standard Christian group; and the rare individual who exemplifies them – genuine purity and humility, death to selfishness, freedom from rage and depression, and so on – will stand out in the the group with all the obtrusiveness of a sore thumb. He or she will be a constant hindrance in group processes and will be personally conflicted by those processes, for he or she will not be living on the same terms as the others. "

As I coached basketball many years ago, I would look for that which needed to be changed to bring us success and then administer corrective steps to that end. So also in the Christian's life. We must deny denial, allow the Lord to examine us thoroughly. Show us what is wrong, weak or obstructing God's life living through us. Then pray that long, deeply theological prayer: "HELP!" And cooperate with the Lord as He brings circumstances our way to work on growth. Spiritual Formation!