Abandoned to Great Victory

I had my dream job as a faculty member at a well-respected Christian university. My pretty wife and I had a bright 6-year-old son. I had told a friend I felt like I had “life by the tail”, but there were some hints of problems. My wife was distant and often seemed unhappy. We had gone to marriage counseling where she talked of her personal unhappiness.

Six months into my new job, I came home from school one afternoon, excited about life, to find half of the furniture gone. A note was lying on the table saying, “we’re gone.” My wife had left, taken my son and begun her 1500 mile trek to be with the other man with whom it appeared she was in love.

The next door neighbor came over and said, “I saw the moving van at your house today and knew something was up. I suppose you’ll give up your new position and move back to start over.” The silly thought came to me, “WWSD – what would satan do?” I knew Satan wanted me to give up. My neighbor’s comment strengthened my resolve to “stay the course.”

With half the furniture gone, I stood in my near-empty living room and just howled out my pain and sense of loss. I was filled with an overwhelming feeling of failure. No one in my extended family had ever divorced. That was the low point of my life.

My passionate testimony today is that God is a God of second chances. Life’s lowest point has been reengineered by God. Romans 8:28 (all things work together for good…) has transpired. I maintained first telephone and then physical contact with my son, leading to joint custody. I took a four-year span of single hood to rediscover myself. I did a huge amount of scholarly research and writing that occupied my time and gave me a firm professional foundation. Recovery took place.

These days, I like to tell people that God is “the world’s greatest relief pitcher.” When my wife left and took my son, I was down 12 to 1 and God said, “Trust me—I can pull this out.” He turned the bad game into a World Series victory. I’ve got a wonderful second wife and together we have five children. The second marriage is infinitely more fulfilling and exciting than the first. We have traveled all over the world together. We minister together. I have a record of important accomplishment at another Christian university. My first wife and I have an amiable relationship.

I continue to believe that divorce is not God’s “primary will” for his children, but when marriages don’t work, my experience is that the Great Creator works with us to craft a wonderful alternative plan for our lives. I wouldn’t be where I am today without experiencing that darkest moment.

(anonymous)